Pitch Revision

Elevator Line:

A man misses his train, and ends up getting onto a train filled with his personal demons.

Theme(s):
We hold ourselves back, Wrong Train, Ghost Train, Personal Demons,

Setting:

1920's, countryside train station

Summary:

Oliver, an average, but jittery, working class man headed to the city, gets to the train station just as his train is leaving the station. As he's looking at the train schedule, a different, menacing train pulls up going the same direction as the previous train. Oliver looks at the train, obviously put off by it, but after looking at his pocket watch decides to get on anyway.
As the train begins to move, Oliver is alone in a decrepit, compartment style passenger train. Dust, rust, cobwebs, and dander cover every nook and cranny, and all the windows are grimy. Just visible out of the aisle windows is a gray and desolate landscape. When Oliver looks back towards where he got on the train, all he sees is darkness. He backs away from it and begins to move through the train, having nowhere else to go.
As he moves through the train, he encounters a shadowy figure who proceeds to chase him through the train, forcing Oliver to work through various obstacles, including dodging chains which try to latch onto him and a room full of mechanical implements and contraptions.
When he finally makes it to the back of the train, he opens the final door which is the only "clean" looking thing in the train, and sees on the other side a normal looking train, with people seated in rows and reading newspapers and doing other normal activities one would perform on a train. But, as Oliver attempts to go into the car with the other people, he is grabbed by the chains and pulled back to the shadowy figure. As the figure reaches for Oliver, he sees that the figure has his face.